Hello! I hope for a sensible and wise…

Hello! I hope for a sensible and wise advice Letters will be many, that is, to want to convey every important moment With his the first man I met about 4 years Love were crazy strong, especially with his hand, he hour could not hold out to find out how I am where I am, not bad there, if you needed any help, he’s always been there(when I studied or worked nearby, he was mentally and morally) I could always rely on him, he is in any situation was behind me a mountain, what can I say, I just felt that I love But I apparently was still very young and wanted some passion, stay with friends, freedom some🤷🏽♀at that time, I got a job in a good firm to work, great team, high wages, clubs/restaurants/girlfriend, but it is at all I never cheated on him, even in thought, But he became very jealous, and ask me to stay permanently at home, a very long time to persuade me to marry him and live a full family. But I was stupid and neglected them, he went to another city, I strongly was not upset , I thought he’d be back soon but he didn’t come back After about a year and a half, I got married, the first time the euphoria feelings, but every altercation or absence of a spouse, I thought about it for a long time I suppressed these feelings and tried to forget, at some point I really thought I forgot, but then there was the problem with her husband, it was completely not who he claimed to be and home often began to be a serious scandal And one day I saw my ex about an hour standing outside my house,near the door, was sitting in the car I don’t know what he wanted, but after that I’m rihnulis a couple of years Later I split up with my husband, are unable to suppress thoughts about my last love Now I’m alone, and through certain people, I accidentally found out that my ex-m/h all the time there was one(serious relationship), and I’m a dumbass decided he turned to the woman, she put me card and told that he was suffering madly, for him my marriage was a kind of death, he barely pulled through and with great difficulty got to his feet, said that the relationship has no that there are most likely a very short connection, but about me trying not to think, suppresses thoughts I don’t know whether to believe all this to her, to try to go to him for relationship or to forget and not to return to the past, because we certainly have other people?! Me breaks inside when I think about him all in the chest shrinks don’t want to believe that you’ve lost this person forever

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